All those wasted years….from fumbling teenager to inadequate adult I (like many other men) have been searching for the holy grail, only to find it does not really exist.
Just like my disappointment on hearing that Santa is an imaginary figure, that politicians never deliver what they promise, or bankers are just greedy twats, I feel totally deflated.
It seems that a team of scientists at Kings College London have concluded, after an extensive study of over 1,800 British women, that the G-spot is not real.
The magic ‘spot’ that all men have been led to believe is the key to opening the door to any woman’s heart and guarantee they are regarded as the greatest of lovers, turns out to be nothing more than a myth – at least in scientific terms.
However, on thinking about it…. it WAS only 1.800 women and they are all British.
I think to be fully convinced and in the interests of the human race, I should carry on with my personal research until I find the definitive answer.
After all….do scientists do sex?
Whoops! I erased the comments in error…
Will try to re-instate them.
part1. I'm in the queue of your experiment. How long do I wait for? A woman's ability to climax tends to improve with age.
But we know that some women get well into mid-life before they manage to have an orgasm. However, the important thing is that you should never regard it as ‘too late’. Time and again we have heard of women who have learned to orgasm when they were in their 40s, 50s – and even later.
In February 2009, Danish psychosexual therapist called Pia Struck presented the results of a study at the Royal Society of Medicine she had made of 500 women.
These women all had long histories of difficulties with orgasm and 25 per cent of them had never climaxed. Their ages ranged from 18 to 88.
They were helped through the Betty Dodson method (see above) and were treated by use of group therapy, where they were encouraged to think more positively about their genitals and to learn acceptance of their sexuality through touch. They also embarked on practical sex-therapy by using clitoral vibrators.
Of these women, 465 (93 per cent) had an orgasm which was witnessed by a therapist. And it was reported that the post-menopausal women among them were just as able to achieve orgasm as the younger participants in the study. So, clearly, you are never too old to become orgasmic.
There can of course be other problems in midlife around the time of the menopause. Most of these difficulties occur because of all the hormonal changes going on in the body. And it's extremely common for women to 'go off' sex temporarily simply because it becomes too dry and uncomfortable.
Fortunately, there are all sorts of ways to remedy this nowadays. There are good over-the-counter lubricants like Wet, Silk, Astroglide, Senselle and K-Y Jelly. These are all suitable, by the way, for any age of woman.
In mid-life there is also the option of going on HRT, but this is something that any woman should think about very carefully indeed. Until recently, it was widely believed that HRT commonly helped a woman to feel much better generally, and to feel more sexy in particular. However, the picture has now changed significantly.
Extensive research into HRT now suggests that though it is still very effective for ridding a woman of unpleasant menopausal symptoms such as hot flushes and sweating attacks, it is not safe to use long term. So it should definitely not be viewed as a magical youth elixir that you start taking at the menopause and continue using till you’re a very old lady.
Nowadays, many women find that health supplements such as soya and red clover also alleviate menopausal symptoms, and actually help them to feel younger and fitter too. You can take these by mouth – Aria One-a-Day Soya tablets and Novogen Red Clover tablets are examples of the brands available – and there are also ‘natural’ oestrogen products for lubricating the vagina, such as Phyto Soya Vaginal Gel Pessaries.
However, it must be stressed that the use of these supplements is in its infancy, and you may want to consult a nutritionist before putting yourself on them. These sorts of supplements are readily available in high street pharmacies such as Boots and Lloyds and also in health food shops.
Part2 How can men help?
2 Remember that most women need stimulation of the clitoris. This is the part of them that would have turned into a penis had they developed as males – and it's just as important to women as the penis is to a guy.
2 Remember that love, romance, cuddling and a good atmosphere turn women on in the early stages of a sex session just as much as your caresses do.
3 Take your time.
4 Caress her breasts – a few women learn to climax through breast fondling alone.
* Give her oral sex. Most women adore this and some claim that they cannot come unless a man 'goes down' on them.
5 Don't be too proud to ask her to show you what she wants.
6 Have some sex sessions where you encourage her to take the initiative and to decide the agenda.
If you lose control and come before her, do try to summon some energy to kiss and stimulate her so that she can climax, too.
Do tell her that she's marvellous, sexy and beautiful.
Summing up
Having an orgasm is a lovely feeling. You are entitled to it, but it's not easy to do if you are uptight, tired, stressed or unhappy in your relationship. If in doubt, seek help from an expert advisor.
Part3.A good 'reaching orgasms' video (such as Betty Dodson's Selfloving) is very helpful in this respect.
Sorry, I was unable to post in one go your box told me off.
Part4 Just a joke but I only expected to come here once or twice not four in one go! 😉
Blimey and there was me thinking life was simple!!